I was hired to perform as a booth draw
at a street fair a few years ago by a local chamber of commerce. I
had been at it for 3 hours and was getting pretty burned out, so I
was just going through the motions really. I was surrounded by
children and adults pushing and shoving to get closer to see the
magician and his tricks....you have all felt the burn out you know
what I mean here. it was then that I noticed out of the corner of my
eye a shadow that stayed just out of the ring of gawkers and
pushers....it was such a small shadow a mere wisp that no one seemed
to notice at all. this ghost of a girl caught my eye because she
tried to hide. not from me but from the world. her hand never left
her mouth. she could barely see what I was doing but I could tell she
was interested as she would slightly adjust her position to see
through the others there. there was something about her that just
fascinated me. it drew me like a moth to a flame. the pull was so
strong that I stopped mid trick. I moved through the crowd towards
her. the fear in her eyes was like looking into the eyes of a deer
that is looking down the barrel of your rifle. it knows its trapped
and the fear and the sadness are all that can be seen as it waits its
impending doom. once I was standing in front of this little 4 year
old who never moved her hand from her mouth my heart shook with fear.
what have I done! I have drawn attention to a little child that was
so beaten down with rejection and hid in her fear and shame! her
parents were stood back and just watching the interaction as I knelt
down in front of this child. I could sense the fear on them that I
was about to humiliate their child but they felt that they could not
stop it as it was a very public place. I could feel the resignation
rolling off them as they to seemed to have hidden in shame...
I could not stop my self it was a draw
that would not be denied.
i knelt down in my $400.00 suit in
front of her. i put out my hand to shake hers she reluctantly
switched the hand that was covering her face so that she could be
polite. I reached down and lifted her in my arm as I headed back to
the front of the group who now parted as the red sea in front of
Moses. I stood her in front of me on my table. I looked her in the
eyes and said. "may I please show you some magic?" her eyes
lit up like the stars in the clear night sky. "yes please"
she whispered. so I started a few routines that would help to loosen
her up, while her hand never left her mouth. I did not know what drew
me to her but I knew that I must obey the call. I brought out a
little ball made of sponge. I made it dance and float from location
to location. it vanished and reappeared over and over all the while
people forgot that she was the ghost. they began to be enthralled as
I was by the reactions this wisp of a child let fly out through her
eyes. those eyes were so expressive. they told you volumes about her
life. a glow was seen as she forgot more and more about her hand and
concentrated more and more on the magic that was taking place. it was
then that I held out both of my hands in an invitation for her to
take them. I watched the fear spring back into her eyes as she looked
quickly around at those who were watching. she looked back at me and
I saw it. the moment when her courage and determination not to let me
down took hold and her hands slowly lowered and took hold of mine. I
saw her flinch from my gaze as if waiting for the judgment that was
sure to come. that always came when she moved her hand. you see this
child was born with a cleft lip. she had lived her young life with
the taunts and tease of her peers and adults that saw her. she was
made to believe that she had no value, that she was ugly.
for a moment I thought she was about
to let go and bring her hand back up to hide, but she did not. she
slowly brought her eyes back up to mine wondering why I did not push
her away or scream out in repulsion. what she saw was tears in my
eyes as I locked eyes with her and said "you are the most
beautiful lady I have ever seen" confusion, doubt, wonder. many
things passed through her eyes as she watched for a sign that I was
mocking her. then she threw her arms around my neck and just hugged
me. it was a few minutes before she pulled back. the tears and smiles
all over her face. she had found acceptance from someone she thought
was important. she looked out over the crowd as if daring them to
deny that she was a person.
this young lady was my assistant for
the rest of the weekend gig. she would chastise her parents if they
did not get her to her job on time. she was important now. she
performed many more gigs with me over the years as she now knew she
was a magical creature. she was not just a clone of the cosmetic
companies. she was unique. she was a one of a kind. it was that one
magic moment that changed everything. the people that were there will
not be the sames. the parents were changed, the girls personal self
worth was changed and most of all I was changed. I saw what real
magic can do. and I have since been trying to recapture that moment
in all my magic. in fact in all my life. i lost track of her but I
still hear from her parents and they give me updates on her success.
magic is not about the trick it is
about creating a new reality. if I change a coin to another coin and
give it to the person I changed it for, I have created a new reality
for him that he can see, and feel. I have locked a magical moment in
time that can never be undone. if i can take something mundane and
elevate it to a a miracle I have created a magic that has a meaning
that will be long remembered. if I can take a sad child and cause her
to laugh then my life has been justified and that is magic for me.
causing change in a world to create a place of joy even for just a
moment is magical in its purity. those that see it will want more.
they will hunger for it. they will create it for them selves. for me
the magic I perform is real. it is sharing a reality that can be with
those that watch me.
Michael
