tomorrow may not be here for me so I live today with all the power of hope

 to know that your death is close gives you a perspective that few ever know. what you do with the time left will define you in the eyes of those you leave behind. how will you live the last days of your life? in fear? or will you step out and live the life you should have lived all along?

I have been diagnosed with congestive heart failure. I have been told that i have weeks left to live. they told me that if I have a bypass surgery that it may save my life. the problem is that the soonest I can get in to have the procedure is weeks away........ should I hide? should I deny? should I worry or fear that I may not make it to the date? no none of those things will do. if I make the date then I will live longer and have more time, but if I do not make it then I want my last days to be ones of joy. days of living and loving. I want to leave a legacy behind that will be cherished by those that I have made a connection with.

Can I create a little magic in someones life?

I have come a crossed some stories that just hurt my heart to read them. I like most people feel bad about what happen and send prayers of hope to them, but in the end im just thankful nothing like that has happened to my family. it dawned on me that as an entertainer and a magician I can reach a lot of people. touch a lot of lives, why can't I perform magic that will actually help people and make a difference in their lives? it is in that light that I have taken on a multimedia help campaign to help a local family that got burned out of their home. this family has not had an easy life to start with and this was just the last straw in a mountain of straw for them. I paid an ad supported post asking for help and drawing attention to this cause. I will be trying to raise money for this family and it would really be a magic moment if I can get others to champion this cause. it would be great to get these people back on their feet.

this to me is magic. a magic that means a change in someones life. a magic that shows that love and support can come from total strangers.

here is a link if you would like to help. this is heart breaking story but im hoping it has a very happy ending.
https://www.facebook.com/permalink.php?story_fbid=527773530614917&id=116625445063063&notif_t=like

The magic that changed my life

 I was hired to perform as a booth draw at a street fair a few years ago by a local chamber of commerce. I had been at it for 3 hours and was getting pretty burned out, so I was just going through the motions really. I was surrounded by children and adults pushing and shoving to get closer to see the magician and his tricks....you have all felt the burn out you know what I mean here. it was then that I noticed out of the corner of my eye a shadow that stayed just out of the ring of gawkers and pushers....it was such a small shadow a mere wisp that no one seemed to notice at all. this ghost of a girl caught my eye because she tried to hide. not from me but from the world. her hand never left her mouth. she could barely see what I was doing but I could tell she was interested as she would slightly adjust her position to see through the others there. there was something about her that just fascinated me. it drew me like a moth to a flame. the pull was so strong that I stopped mid trick. I moved through the crowd towards her. the fear in her eyes was like looking into the eyes of a deer that is looking down the barrel of your rifle. it knows its trapped and the fear and the sadness are all that can be seen as it waits its impending doom. once I was standing in front of this little 4 year old who never moved her hand from her mouth my heart shook with fear. what have I done! I have drawn attention to a little child that was so beaten down with rejection and hid in her fear and shame! her parents were stood back and just watching the interaction as I knelt down in front of this child. I could sense the fear on them that I was about to humiliate their child but they felt that they could not stop it as it was a very public place. I could feel the resignation rolling off them as they to seemed to have hidden in shame...

I could not stop my self it was a draw that would not be denied.

i knelt down in my $400.00 suit in front of her. i put out my hand to shake hers she reluctantly switched the hand that was covering her face so that she could be polite. I reached down and lifted her in my arm as I headed back to the front of the group who now parted as the red sea in front of Moses. I stood her in front of me on my table. I looked her in the eyes and said. "may I please show you some magic?" her eyes lit up like the stars in the clear night sky. "yes please" she whispered. so I started a few routines that would help to loosen her up, while her hand never left her mouth. I did not know what drew me to her but I knew that I must obey the call. I brought out a little ball made of sponge. I made it dance and float from location to location. it vanished and reappeared over and over all the while people forgot that she was the ghost. they began to be enthralled as I was by the reactions this wisp of a child let fly out through her eyes. those eyes were so expressive. they told you volumes about her life. a glow was seen as she forgot more and more about her hand and concentrated more and more on the magic that was taking place. it was then that I held out both of my hands in an invitation for her to take them. I watched the fear spring back into her eyes as she looked quickly around at those who were watching. she looked back at me and I saw it. the moment when her courage and determination not to let me down took hold and her hands slowly lowered and took hold of mine. I saw her flinch from my gaze as if waiting for the judgment that was sure to come. that always came when she moved her hand. you see this child was born with a cleft lip. she had lived her young life with the taunts and tease of her peers and adults that saw her. she was made to believe that she had no value, that she was ugly.

for a moment I thought she was about to let go and bring her hand back up to hide, but she did not. she slowly brought her eyes back up to mine wondering why I did not push her away or scream out in repulsion. what she saw was tears in my eyes as I locked eyes with her and said "you are the most beautiful lady I have ever seen" confusion, doubt, wonder. many things passed through her eyes as she watched for a sign that I was mocking her. then she threw her arms around my neck and just hugged me. it was a few minutes before she pulled back. the tears and smiles all over her face. she had found acceptance from someone she thought was important. she looked out over the crowd as if daring them to deny that she was a person.

this young lady was my assistant for the rest of the weekend gig. she would chastise her parents if they did not get her to her job on time. she was important now. she performed many more gigs with me over the years as she now knew she was a magical creature. she was not just a clone of the cosmetic companies. she was unique. she was a one of a kind. it was that one magic moment that changed everything. the people that were there will not be the sames. the parents were changed, the girls personal self worth was changed and most of all I was changed. I saw what real magic can do. and I have since been trying to recapture that moment in all my magic. in fact in all my life. i lost track of her but I still hear from her parents and they give me updates on her success.

magic is not about the trick it is about creating a new reality. if I change a coin to another coin and give it to the person I changed it for, I have created a new reality for him that he can see, and feel. I have locked a magical moment in time that can never be undone. if i can take something mundane and elevate it to a a miracle I have created a magic that has a meaning that will be long remembered. if I can take a sad child and cause her to laugh then my life has been justified and that is magic for me. causing change in a world to create a place of joy even for just a moment is magical in its purity. those that see it will want more. they will hunger for it. they will create it for them selves. for me the magic I perform is real. it is sharing a reality that can be with those that watch me.

Michael